I Always Have Max Green X Ronnie Radke
by scenequeenskittlez
Summary: Ronnie gets an unexpected visit from Max. At first, he wants nothing more than for him to leave. By the end, he regrets ever making him walk out the door. *I wanted to take a break from my by "Moxie" fic, so I wrote this! Enjoy!*


Free. I guess that's how you could sum up how I felt. I was out of prison. I was clean. I'm not going to lie. I wanted a line more than anything. But I wasn't risking going back to jail for that. That was the worst two and a half years of my life. I was craving a drink, but knowing me, I would do something incredibly stupid. I rested in the couch, enjoying the feel of real furniture. The TV was on, playing some music show I could really care less about. My thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door. I opened it to see a face I wasn't planning on seeing ever again.

"Max," I mumbled to myself, staring at him. His eyes were heavily lined with makeup, making them greener than before. His lips looked fuller. Hair was longer. But it was what was behind those green eyes that scared me. They were lifeless. Dead. The only thing I saw in them was a spark. A small spark. The only piece of the real him left. I knew what it was. I had gotten past my drug addiction. He hadn't. "Max," I said loud enough so he could hear me. He looked right into my eyes, sending a jolt of something down my spine. His eyes bore into mine. He opened his lips to speak.

"Ronnie," He addressed me. His voice was different. Coarser. Most likely from all the screaming. "I'm sorry," Two simple words. Two simple words that he didn't mean. Couldn't mean. "But I'm clean now. I'm better. And I want us to be the same. Like we used to be. Brothers." Clean? No. Fuck. No.

"No, Max. No! You're lying! Like you fucking lied about everything else!" He tried to say something, but I cut him off. "You don't get to speak. Do you know what you did to me? My friend. My best fucking friend left me in prison. Completely forgot about me. Never visited because he was too busy with his fucking band. My band," My muscled were trembling. I couldn't hit him. Couldn't hurt him.

"You can't run from your past forever," He said. "Escape The Fate is a part of you. It still is! So am I! Ten years! We were friends for ten fucking years. I mess up once, and it's all over?" His eyes had become glossy. But I knew Max. He doesn't cry.

"Max, you don't get it. You left me there. The person that I cared most about in the world. You weren't there for me. I would have been there for you! I never would have left you. You don't even know how I scared I was. I need you," I whispered the last part. Something flashed in his eyes. Hurt? Regret? I don't know.

"I'm not going to leave you anymore," Max said. "I want to be here for you now! You don't know how terrible I felt. But I was scared too. I didn't visit because it was too painful. Too painful to see someone I love that scared. To see the guy who was never scared terrified. I couldn't handle it. Please, just let me in. We can talk about this."

I sighed and opened the door a bit more. "Come in," I told him. He stepped through the door, and eventually sat next to me on the couch, though I made sure there was space between us. "I have questions that need answers," He nodded. "Why? Just why did you forget about me?"

"I didn't forget about you. I could never forget about you, Ronnie. I love you! That's why! I couldn't see the person that I love most that hurt. That terrified! I fucking love you, and I never got the chance. Once I didn't visit you, I felt terrible. I took more drugs. I figured you'd never know how I felt, I might as well enjoy the high, and die in the process. Better than see what I did to you," He rushed the whole thing out. Max… loved me? Like a brother… right?

"You… you love me?" I shook my head this couldn't be happening. No. Not Max. I thought I knew everything about him.

"Always have," He whispered.

"But, you're not…gay," It was the only thing I could say.

"I don't know what I am. I just know that I love you. I fucking love you," His cheeks were pink. Somehow, he still managed to get embarrassed after all this. I don't think I can take this.

"No," I stood up. "You don't. If you loved me, you would have cared enough to visit. How do you think I felt. You were fucking touring the world with Mabbitt, and I was stuck in a jail cell!" I saw a single tear track on his face. "Out," I demanded, pointing at the door.

"Guess I deserved it," He said standing up. "But Ronnie, you miss me. And you may not know it, but you love me too. You always have," He walked out, shutting the door behind him. I let a few tears fall from my eyes. He was right… I had always loved him.

_Now you notice me once again, after your so called friends have failed you,_

_You're lucky I'm a fucking whore, and don't know how to not love you,_

_So you love me now, for most it would be too late,_

_But as I've said before, you're lucky I'm a fucking whore,_

_And give you enough to hate._

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><p><em><strong>Hello! Okay, so I decided to write another one-shot, while pondering what to do with the big Moxie fic (Max+Ronnie) Can't wait for it to be done so I can upload it!<strong>_


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